When you think of some of the greatest feuds of all time, there is an impressive list:
Montagues and the Capulets
Hatfields and McCoys
Sharks and the Jets
But there is one feud that has been alive for years now right here in DC. This conflict flashes out periodically throughout the course of every summer. It's a conflict over land, a conflict of zeal, and a conflict of superiority. This feud has no end in sight and will continue to rage as long the sun continues to shine in DC.
I refer of course to the battle between the rugged, talented, athletic softball players and the leggy, mall bogarting, field fairy soccer players.
That's right, without fail, a group of futbol players will surface on any given softball night and try to squeeze a game in between two softball games on the mall. They'll do it around the monument to, or anywhere there isn't space. They'll get in the way of your outfielders, they'll kick the ball into your infield, then they'll sit there and stare at you like it's your fault. These field fairies are tough nuts.
Many a fresh, baby-faced intern have had to face these brutal arch-enemies of softball when it comes to field claiming. The stakes have always been high, one groups livelihood on the line, the loser will go home and get fat from lack of exercise.
The conflict has gotten to the point where many softball teams have recruited ex-soccer players to act as envoys, sending them out to converse with the enemy prior to first pitch in an effort to avoid sending a goal-keeper to the hospital with a concussion from getting hit in the back of the head by a fly-ball, and even worse, stopping the ball from going it's true distance and possibly costing the hitter a Home Run.
A solution to this feud evades both sides to this date, we can only hope that something will break before the casualty count begins to pile up.
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